The Day that wasn't meant to be...

So i return to write again after a long time, now without apologies for the irregularity...its easy for me to realise i write only when compelled or moved by somethin deeply (emotionally, for the most part..). However, if that be my argument, then i contradict myself coz what has transpired in the past two months has been that one big event that has left an indelible void in my existence.

It isn't easy, i'm not fine, i'm not ok....heck, i won't be...ever...i don't think i'm capable. Its just that decisions have been made...how they affect me is irrelevant. There is no angst i wish to express...there is grief, entirely my own...i'l hav to live with that.

i write this post midnight, but then someone pointed out that it isn't the same time everywhere...let us then stay in the day that was/is..

it was meant to be special...it was meant to be celebrated...it had been prepared for many months in advance...a performance...a reminiscence...a serenade...

...guess i'l be on my own humming some sad song while my guitar gently weeps...

I like to pretend that evrythin is alright...coz wen everybody else thinks ur fine,u forget for a while that ur not..